The President Wrote My Letter of Recommendation!

President's Day“Wouldn’t that be great. I’m in!”

Or are you?

On this President’s Day, let’s think about it: Would a letter of recommendation from President Barack Obama, POTUS himself, ensure your acceptance?

I’m sure a letter from President Obama would get passed around the admissions office. That presidential seal and signature (even if from a machine) would be an eye catcher, but is it equivalent to “I’m in!”

How about from a past president? Maybe a senator? Or governor? The president of a Fortune 500 company? Maybe Mark Zuckerberg? Would he do it?

Actually, the title after the author’s name doesn’t matter nearly as much as the substance above the signature. Can the author, whatever his or her title, talk from personal experiences about your character when answering  the questions posed in a recommendation form or in writing the typical letter of recommendation?  If the recommender doesn’t have that personal perspective, can’t bring detail and example to the letter, the title may be a curiosity, but no more. That VIP letter could be less effective than a detail-filled letter from your twenty-something team lead who writes with specific examples and persuasive substance about your contribution to her organization.

Now if President Obama were to write about:

  • The difference you made to his campaign or your contribution to nabbing Osama bin Laden,
  • Your ability to organize his brilliant social media campaign,
  • An example of integrity, or
  • Your initiative during the budget ceiling crisis.

Then you would have an extraordinarily powerful letter of recommendation. However if he (or his third secretary twice removed) just wrote a general, flowery ode to how wonderful you are with no specifics, it would be no value. It would just be a shiny seal and sig.

Of course if your team lead wrote about:

  • Your contribution to the team and the difference you have made to the bottom line.
  • Your ability to organize a social media campaign or just about anything else of significance.
  • An example of integrity.
  • Your initiative and cool during a crisis.

You would also have a compelling letter of recommendation.

So on this President’s Day, keep in mind that a powerful letter of recommendation is much more about substance than station, personal insight than position, examples than eminence.

Linda AbrahamBy Linda Abraham, president and founder of Accepted.com and author of MBA Admission for Smarties: The No-Nonsense Guide to Acceptance at Top Business Schools.

The Accepted Admissions Consulting Blog covers the college, MBA, medical school, law school, and graduate school admissions scene. You’ll find everything from testing tips, essay advice, and interview guidance to rankings. Subscribe now!

Write Great College Application Essays and Stay Sane: Part 2

How to Stay Sane While Writing Your College EssaysThanks for joining us as we continue with Staying Sane through the College Essay Writing Process, an ongoing series that offers college applicants and their parents advice on how to stay on track for completing Ivy-worthy essays…without flying off the handle. Enjoy this next part of the series, and STAY SANE!

Why students think the college application essay is hard to write:

  • You have to talk about yourself.
  • You have to make a good impression.
  • You have to look into your experience to show something important about yourself when you don’t necessarily think what is important about you will impress college admissions committees.
  • You don’t honestly think you know enough about yourself and the world (isn’t that why you are going to college?) to write convincingly.
  • You haven’t had much writing experience that calls for assessing your personal experience to make a point about your abilities and interests.

Why parents have trouble helping their kids with the college application essay writing process:

  • They focus on the competitive nature of college admissions and are so quick to judge their kids’ writing that they don’t nourish the spark of individuality that is in early drafts.
  • Focusing on the looming deadlines, they are quick to judge their kids as terribly behind in completing the applications, and kids don’t listen to the resulting nagging.
  • They think they know the right story to tell and want their kids to tell the one they think is best.
  • They think they are better writers than their kids and correct drafts, making them sound too adult and often too general, and alienate their kids, who feel their experience is being falsified.
  • They do not know the writing process themselves and, feeling incompetent as writers, they worry, worry, worry about how their kids will ever write the essay. Kids don’t respond enthusiastically to worry. Or nagging. Or corruption of their story.

Why it’s hard for kids to have their parents help:

  • They understand their experiences differently than their parents do.
  • They feel that by putting their experiences and thinking on the page, they may fail their parents if their parents don’t find enough in the experiences to please them.
  • Kids begin feeling their parents think they know the kids better than the kids know themselves. Therefore, having parents as a first audience can short circuit the kids’ own way of thinking things through.
  • There may be disagreement about which schools students should apply to.

What everyone can do to be more effective and get the essay done and done well:

  • Have a family meeting in which students and parents honestly state their needs, fears, and understanding of the task ahead. If parents and students don’t concur on the appropriateness of some of the colleges chosen, agree to put forward reasons pro and con, just so they are heard.
  • Write down everyone’s suggestions about how to get through the weeks ahead and accomplish the task of writing for the college application essay.  Really listen to the suggestions and don’t pooh pooh any of them.
  • Parents listen to students state what help they most need. If parents and students decide someone else’s help might work better, brainstorm names of those who might offer help, including services experienced in coaching students to write the application essay.
  • If parents and/or students are worried about getting the application and writing tasks done on time despite a myriad of activities, spend some time discussing the chosen colleges’ application requirements, agreeing to and writing down a timeline, and proposing other sources of help — books, professional college admissions counselors, relatives and neighbors who write well or are easy to talk with, as well as reputable editing services that work with high school kids, honoring their abilities to write and coaching them one-on-one.
  • Become more effective by discussing ahead of time why waiting until the last minute is not a good idea, why parents bugging offspring to finish the essay is not a good idea, and why kids not communicating their progress to their parents is also not a good idea.  Discuss what sort of system can be put in place to emphasize writing time, complete the essay, and handle privacy issues during the drafting process.
  • Be sure to designate some sort of celebration or reward to honor the finish of each application.

And students, remember that physical exercise can be a great way to think of good writing ideas or clear your mind so you can continue the writing process.  Keeping a pad and pencil by your bed means you can jot ideas down if they come to you in a dream or upon waking before your mind has taken on the day. Parents — don’t quiz your kids on whether they have gotten any new ideas when they wake up or have come in from shooting baskets! Ideas need time to gel. They often flee when talked about too soon.

Sheila BenderBy Sheila Bender, former Accepted.com editor and founder of Writing it Real, a “community and resource center for writing from personal experience.”[hs_action id="3910"]

Write Great College Application Essays and Stay Sane: Part I

Applying to CollegeThe college admissions process isn’t easy…for anyone. Parents look at their kids and think, “You think this is hard on you? Just imagine what we’re going through, thinking about application deadlines, our hopes and dreams for you, and paying for college,” while kids glare at their parents thinking, “I don’t know why you’re so stressed out. You’re not ones who have to take the SAT, write these detailed essays, and compete against their friends for coveted Ivy League spots!”

Sigh. The grass is always greener on the other side.

Our upcoming blog series, Write Great College Application Essays and Stay Sane, will help college applicants and their parents stay on track for completing Ivy-worthy essays…without flying off the handle. Over the course of this series, you’ll learn tips for easing essay anxiety, get advice on how to choose compelling essay topics, and acquire insights into the essay writing process, beginning to end.

Enjoy our new series, and STAY SANE!

When a family’s high school student must write the college application essay, the pressure is on everyone.  Parents worry that their teenagers aren’t sitting down soon enough to write a really good essay. They worry their students sound too modest, too revealing, or too silly or simple. Often, students don’t believe they have anything interesting to say, let alone to faceless people who will be judging them.  They haven’t lived long enough to have figured out the significance of their experiences, even if they want to write about them, and having their parents or teachers tell them the significance is the last thing in the world they want to have happen. Students worry about how to present themselves on the page in a way that sounds real and like them, and often feel that when adults help, the wording and ideas just don’t sound right. Additionally, they have full academic schedules and numerous extracurricular activities, making it easier to procrastinate than find the time and emotional space to sit down and begin discovering what it is they have to say to college admissions committees.

Here’s the good news:  Whether the students have three months, three weeks, or three days to complete the essay (and I’d vote for the three months, but some decisions are made late, and inspiration sometimes needs a tight deadline), there is a process that can help them enjoy writing their personal statement, as well as aid them to learn about themselves and grow as individuals — something that really does prepare them for college. And the process defines a clear and useful role for parents’ and/or other adult help.

The overall steps to the process are:

  1. After students know what schools they will be applying to, they should visit each school website, download any school-specific application essay questions, and find the common application essay questions to choose from. Note that some schools also require a supplemental essay.
  2. Play with images, words, memories and writing strategies, and then do a freewrite of whatever comes to mind. This means setting fingers to the keyboard or pen to paper and just writing without thinking, censoring, or deliberating. In freewriting, writers get ideas down and go wherever their thoughts, memories, and images take them.
  3. Put that writing away.
  4. Let trusted adults listen to you read the freewrites.  (If the material or situation is too sensitive for parents’ to hear at this time, let parents help figure out who might be a good choice as listener among colleagues, relatives, friends, and teachers. Keep parents informed about approaching these potential critics for their listening skills and about your own schedule in sticking to the steps this book suggests.)
  5. From others’ and your own response to hearing yourself read in front of an audience even of one, identify where your energy, honesty, and interest lie in the earliest freewrites.
  6. Write that story using the process this book puts forward.

The sub-steps include: using the pre-writing strategies of brainstorming and clustering; identifying patterns of thinking; learning to trust images, details and specifics; asking for responses from readers to learn which words stick, what feelings are evoked, and where the reader is curious; and revising, revising, revising.

Sheila BenderBy Sheila Bender, former Accepted.com editor and founder of Writing it Real, a “community and resource center for writing from personal experience.”

College Admissions News Roundup

  • Zero Down For College?- BusinessWeek looks at an innovative new idea developed by Fix UC, a group in California that is part of the UC system. Fix UC thinks college students should be able to pay for college by giving 5% of their annual salary to their alma mater for the first 20 years after graduation. This approach would mean parents don’t have to save up for college for their children’s college educations, and the university would be making an investment in its students that would get paid off overtime. Yet it is unlikely that Fix UC’s plan will get carried out, because it has many hurdles and would lead colleges to invest only in producing high-paid graduates (meaning no more English majors).
  • Why Does The Price of College Keep Rising?- The Chronicle of Higher Education looks at why the price of college keeps rising each year at a faster rate than inflation. The answer: people will pay anything to go to college.  Although it has been proven that there is a lifetime payoff for individuals with college degrees, that fact still does not mean that the prices of all colleges are worth it. With people now tightening their belts, colleges will have to prove why they are worth students’ life savings if they want to continue raising prices over the next few years.
  • E-Textbooks On The Rise- Inside Higher Ed reports that colleges are increasingly trying to strike deals with textbook companies to create e-textbooks that are more affordable for their students.  For example, Internet2, a consortium of 221 colleges and universities, has struck deals with Box.com, McGraw-Hill, Wiley & Sons, Bedford, Freeman and Worth, W.W. Norton &Company, Flat World Knowledge, and Hewlett-Packard to get affordable discounts for their students. Universities have more power to broker these deals than their students, and many believe that it is a school’s responsibility to negotiate those discounts.  These partnerships also benefit the textbook companies because they cut into the second-hand textbook business that hurt their sales.
  • College Students Still Getting Hit By Recession- The Chronicle of Education looks at how the recession has hit college students trying to hold part-time jobs. A working paper published by the National Bureau of Economic Research shows that while college students used to work an average of 11 hours per week in 2000, they were only working an average of 8 hours a week in 2009.
  • Vassar Takes Back Acceptances- The New York Times reports that 76 early decision applicants to Vassar College were outraged when they found out they had received acceptance letters BY MISTAKE. Although Vassar has apologized and offered to reimburse students their $65 application fee, some parents believe Vassar should be forced to accept these students because early decision applications are binding. While these parents do not look like they are going to get their way, Vassar acknowledges that it was a terrible mistake and has offered to “explain the situation” to other schools that students may have withdrawn their applications from as a result of this mishap.
  • Stanford Gets A Makeover- The Chronicle of Education reports that Stanford University has decided to transform its curriculum, encouraging students to focus more on critical thinking and less on taking courses in specific disciplines. While the Faculty Senate still needs to review the changes, the goal of this shift is to allow students to develop skills that will enable them to “adapt to a changing world after their formal education has ended.” The recommendations being made to the Faculty Senate focus on freshmen having exposure to many different learning environments and adding a series of course offerings called “Thinking Matters” to the freshman curriculum.

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College Values: A Discussion to Have with Your Eleventh Grader

The Cost of CollegeA recent Today show segment highlighted Princeton Review’s Top College Values.  In the short segment, they highlighted the top 3 public and private colleges deemed a ‘best value’.  While the segment highlighted colleges that I hold in high esteem and have frequently recommended to students, I cringed.

The cost of college is an important consideration for most families — that cost climbs every year, and recently, at a level exceeding the rate of inflation.  But value – how do we judge that?  Can we take empirical indicators (which, it seems, may or may not be valid), total them up to create “academic worth” and then divide by the price tag?  It’s much bigger, more individual and much more complex than that.

When you are submitting the FAFSA, common financial information is shared with each college designated.  Just as your family has a unique financial situation, colleges have differing financial aid budgets, merit scholarship programs, institutional priorities, endowments and other tools at their disposal. Assessing the average “discount” given to matriculating students provides an indication of available merit aid, but shouldn’t be used to create an expectation of merit aid.

Some colleges, such Princeton (profiled by Princeton Review in the segment) have substantial endowments and have made an amazing commitment to making the school affordable to every student who is admitted.  Earning admission is the hard part. Since Princeton does not offer merit scholarships, the true cost of attendance is based upon your family’s need for assistance.

If you are fortunate, and your family is planning to pay your full tuition and related expenses for college, value may still be a consideration.  Are you planning to attend graduate school? How are you planning to pay for it?  What are your career goals and how should you factor that into debt load? Is a state university with a lower price tag a good option for you? How about a less highly regarded college that offers you a substantial merit scholarship?  Each scenario has positives and negatives, but all merit consideration in your planning.

When I begin comprehensive discussions with families, we always touch at least briefly on cost.  I give them the following statement to complete:

College is expensive and…

  • We are prepared to cover all  costs.
  • We are planning to apply for need based financial aid.
  • We are specifically interested in colleges that offer merit scholarships.
  • Cost of attendance will be a factor in where our child goes to college.
  • We have discussed the role of finances in college choice with our child.

The answers to the first three statements help me to offer suggestions of colleges that might make financial sense to a family.  The latter two statements are designed to encourage conversation.

As you compile your tax papers before April 15, consider talking with your student about financial ramifications to their college search.  I don’t recommend eliminating colleges from consideration based solely on cost at this early stage.  As a parent, there is nothing worse than dashing your child’s dreams.  An honest discussion now is far better than seeing the joy on a child’s face after receiving an acceptance letter and dulling it with financial concerns about which he or she was previously clueless.

Whitney BruceBy Whitney Bruce, who has worked in college admissions since 1996. She has served as a Senior Assistant Director of Admissions (Washington U), Application Reader (University of Michigan), Assistant Director of College Counseling (private prep school in St. Louis), and an independent college counselor. She is happy to advise you as you apply to college.[hs_action id="3908"]

Adcoms’ New Tool to Detect Plagiarism in Essays

Writing Your MBA EssaysRather than go through the hassle of writing your application essays yourself, especially since you’re not the most effective or practiced writer (or since you don’t have enough time), why not have someone who really knows how to do it well write them for you?   That someone could be a friend or colleague who’s offered to help or who has some essays that worked in previous years, or it may be a paid essay writing service you found on the web.

This line of thinking is not rare nor unfortunately is the next logical step: going ahead and actually getting someone to write your application essays or personal statement.

In fact, I had a client ask me to write an essay for him just last week. I declined this request, as I and my Accepted.com colleagues have declined all such requests, and convinced the client to draft his own essay. He discovered it wasn’t impossible after all.

And what about your friend’s offer? It may not provide much camouflage,.  And as for services and others you’d pay for an essay, consider the risks: if you’re willing to take the ethical misstep of passing off work as yours that isn’t yours, how and why can you trust someone else to provide original work? How can you be sure this essay is really being written just for you and wasn’t used previously and slightly doctored? Or not doctored at all? Can you trust that service not to take a shortcut and recycle previously used content rather than labor to create a unique essay for you from scratch?

No. You can’t.

The potential danger from compiling essays from previously developed content has just increased significantly: some b-school adcoms are using anti-plagiarism software, called Turnitin, which compares applicants’ essays to a database of previous essay content to identify reused material.  If they find enough matches to indicate plagiarism, they just reject the applicant.  Period.  UCLA Anderson has rejected 52 applicants based solely on plagiarism concerns detected by Turnitin. Anderson doesn’t waste time explaining its reasons to the cheaters, and the applicant may never know the real reason for the rejection.

If you are tempted to hire a service to write your essays and the ethics of the situation don’t deter you, think of the significant  risks inherent in hiring others to author the essays. Those risks may be the shield from temptation. It’s just safer – not to mention better – to do it yourself.

Cindy TokumitsuBy Cindy Tokumitsu, author of numerous ebooks, articles, and special reports. Cindy has advised hundreds of successful applicants in her last thirteen years with Accepted. She can help you assess your strengths and weaknesses and develop a winning admissions strategy.[hs_action id="3913"]

College Admissions News Roundup

  • Does SAT Prep Work?- Inside Higher Ed looks at research published in the journal, Sociology of Education, about the effects of test prep on the college-going population.  The research shows that East Asian American students are more likely to take SAT prep courses and benefit from them than other Asian Americans and members of other racial or ethnic groups. The study also shows that the gains made by East Asian American students were mostly made in the first and second generations, petering out with the next generation in the US.
  • The Common App Gets a Makeover-  The New York Times looks at the new Common Application that streamlines the college application process for high schoolers. The Common App has always been an “all-purpose” form almost 500 colleges and universities use for applications, but the changes that are being made will make it “a smoother, faster, more intuitive” form. Common App 4.0 will be available in 2013 and will have the capacity to process the 10 million applications it is expected to receive by the end of 2020.
  • The Answer: Virtual Internships- BusinessWeek reports that with a shortage of jobs and students having less time to devote to internships, there has been a rise in the number of virtual internships being offered. A virtual internship allows a student to maintain a flexible schedule, work-from-home via skype or e-mail and take jobs in other states or countries.  Internet internships are also beneficial for businesses because they can get students to help them with their social media campaigns and blogging. However, one word of caution: students need to make sure that the virtual internships they find are legitimate opportunities and not scams.
  • No More Early Admissions for Elite East Coasters?- The New York Times reports that as a broader more diverse group of individuals apply for early admissions, there has been a decline in the number of acceptances offered to the typical early-admissions applicants: New York and East Coast prep school students. Teachers and college counselors say that the large number of rejections they received this December shocked students in the top New York private schools. Early applicants are no longer just the wealthier in society, but now include minorities, foreigners and public school students. Bottom line: More diversity amongst early applicants is a good thing.
  • Asia Takes Over- Inside Higher Ed looks at a recent report released by the Observatory on Borderless Higher Education, which shows that there are now 200 overseas branch campuses that have been set up by universities around the world.  With another 37 branch campuses planned, the center of education is moving to Asia. The majority of campuses are being set up in Asia to provide “greater access to an expanding student market” and because the governments support them as a way of keeping their younger population from emigrating.
  • Recruiting Brings OWS To Campus- Inside Higher Ed reports on how elite college students far from Occupy Wall Street have waited for Wall Street to come to them to stage protests.  When JP Morgan-Chase and Goldman Sachs Group Inc. came to Harvard and Princeton to recruit, students created rallies and disruptions, causing some of these recruitment sessions to be cancelled.  These protests are a new tactic for the Occupy movement, which typically targets their institution or Wall Street as a whole.

Accepted.comAccepted.com ~ Helping You Write Your Best[hs_action id="3910"]

How to Choose a College Admissions Consultant

College Admissions ConsultingEarlier this week, my local high school had its college planning night for members of the class of 2013.  As an admissions officer, I was often the guest speaker at such events, and as a high school counselor, the host.  No matter how thorough we tried to be during that evening, families often left with as many questions as answers.  You might be feeling overwhelmed by the possibilities and details, or discouraged by the sheer number of students that high school guidance counselors are asked to assist. Perhaps you are applying to colleges in the United States from abroad, with little experience with the American higher education environment. In all of these situations, you may benefit from working with an independent admissions consultant.

What should you look for in an admissions consultant?

Seek out a consultant who fits your style.  You are going to work closely with this person, whether for a few weeks or a year or longer, and it is important that you are comfortable with the relationship.  Is the consultant open to working with both the student and the parents?  Do you both feel comfortable asking questions of the consultant?  The ease of electronic communication means that you may not need face-to-face meetings with your counselor, or you may strongly desire them.  Some of my students want to pick up the phone and ask a quick question every other day.  Others stick to email. You can find the right independent admissions counselor for you in your neighborhood, in a different state, or on the other side of the globe.

Your consultant should have broad background knowledge and a commitment to continuing education about the college admissions process.  Yes, your next-door neighbor was accepted to a top college last year, and her mother helped her with her applications.  She might have interesting insights to share, but a professional consultant has worked with many families with different admissions profiles. For every hour I spend working with a student, I spend additional time reading, researching schools and programs, networking with colleagues and visiting colleges.  Several professional organizations, including the Higher Education Consultants Association (HECA), the Independent Educational Consultants Association (IECA), and the National Association for College Admission Counseling (NACAC) require their members to maintain a commitment to continuing education and professional development.

An admissions consultant who “guarantees” acceptance to a specific college, or promises to “find scholarship money”, or agrees to write your essays isn’t practicing ethical college counseling.  Run the other way.

Here’s how I view my role in your application process: As an applicant, you are representing yourself in the college admissions process.  As an independent admissions counselor, I am there to help you identify options you might not have considered, present your application in the best possible light, and balance all of the moving parts of your senior year.  I won’t write your essays, but I’ll be your sounding board and help you identify your voice and hone your message.  I’ll commiserate with you when you receive bad news, and celebrate the good news.  My most valuable contribution is providing a seasoned, calm, voice that will guide you through the admissions process while enhancing your chances of acceptance. And since I work very closely with only a small number of students, I can answer the questions that your high school counselor may not have the time to address.

If you are interested in my assistance, please let me know. Now is the perfect time for high school juniors to begin college planning in earnest.  But no matter where you are in the process, I’m ready to help you.

Whitney BruceBy Whitney Bruce, who has worked in college admissions since 1996. She has served as an Senior Assistant Director of Admissions (Washington U), Application Reader (University of Michigan), Assistant Director of College Counseling (private prep school in St. Louis), and an independent college counselor. She is happy to advise you as you apply to college.[hs_action id="3909"]

Claremont McKenna Cheats: Time for Rankings Withdrawal

Stop the Rankings AddictionThere is not much to say about the Claremont McKenna administrator who falsified the school’s average SAT scores to improve Claremont’s U.S. News ranking and its overall appearance of exclusivity and competitiveness. It was fraud. It was wrong. It was stupid. He resigned, and his career in academia is toast. Were more senior administrators complicit? Don’t know. Are other schools doing the same thing? Probably a few.

But what about the consumers of this data? What about the applicants and their parents who applied or failed to apply because they were stoned on rankings? What about ranking addicts?

It’s time for withdrawal.

Let’s first take a look at the nature of rankings. Each one chooses several criteria, weights them, and then ranks. Sometimes the criteria are seemingly objective, like SAT scores, number of articles professors publish in academic journals, percentage of under-represented minorities and women, or salary upon graduation. Other times, rankings reflect surveys – for example surveys of top college administrators for US News’ college ranking, or alumni in Forbes’ and Financial Times’ MBA rankings. And sometimes the rankings reflect a combination of quantitative data and survey responses, and occasionally even a combination of a bunch of rankings (Poets & Quants).

This mishmash of college and graduate school rankings and criteria – even without fraud – are seriously flawed. Assuming accurate reporting, rankings should neither be considered measures of educational quality nor have significant influence on your educational and professional decisions. Here’s why:

  1. If these criteria don’t reflect what’s important to you, they are a terrible basis for your decision.
  2. To the extent they reflect survey results, surveys can be gamed and have inherent limitations. People responding to survey tend to love or hate what they are investing time in. Students and alumni of a given institution have a vested interest in their school having a good ranking. It behooves them to provide “good grades.”
  3. Schools are enormous institutions. The overall rank says nothing about educational quality in your field of study.
  4. Even the so-called objective quantitative measures contain distortions.
  5. Differing rankings of the same programs can give wildly different results.

How should you act in light of the Claremont McKenna College scandal? Get off the rankings crack. Go cold turkey. Kick the habit.

Determine what’s important to you. Research colleges and graduate programs to discover those providing what you value. Apply based on your criteria.

Linda AbrahamBy Linda Abraham, president and founder of Accepted.com and author of MBA Admission for Smarties: The No-Nonsense Guide to Acceptance at Top Business Schools.

 

Article first published as “Claremont McKenna Cheats. Time for Rankings Withdrawal” on Technorati.[hs_action id="3671"]

Photo credit: Douaireg

Do I Have to Write a Parent Letter of Recommendation?

Parent Letters of Rec?As a parent, you might have thought your college application work was done, once you had overseen the last “submit” of the Common Application.  And so it seemed — until you, or one of your friends, receive a letter inviting you to add a parent’s recommendation to your child’s college admission file.

The parent recommendation, much like the peer recommendation, has been around for quite some time at a small number of colleges.  This year, the request by the University of Richmond has sparked conversation.

In my files, I have several old parent recommendations, from corporate parents who graded their children with bullet points of positives and negatives as they would a job candidate to a 3 page, single spaced opus that brought tears to my eyes the first time I read it.  Of course these parents each think their children are wonderful.  As a parent, that’s our job – to be our child’s biggest fan.  But each one makes careful note of the characteristics that make their child human and individual.

I never worked at a college that required a parent (or peer) letter of recommendation, but when I received one unsolicited I read it with joy.  Someone cared about this student and wanted to make him or her known to me.  Well written or not, that additional recommendation makes the applicant a bit more human – more than a GPA or an SAT score, or a list of extracurricular activities.  The additional voice taught me more than an essay about kicking the winning soccer goal ever could.

I’m not suggesting that every parent of a college applicant begin writing an unsolicited recommendation.  Should you be offered the opportunity, take it.  Yes, the reader expects you to be biased, but you know your child in a way that no one else does.  The experiences you find seminal to his childhood or adolescence might not be shared in any other format.  It is insightful, to the admissions office, and probably in the end to the writer as well.

This morning, I pulled out that three-page opus, about a young man, who more than a decade ago was stubborn and serious, and ready to contribute to the fight against global warming.  I wonder what path he’s taken.  I’m still thankful that he and his mother shared his story with me.

Whitney BruceBy Whitney Bruce, who has worked in college admissions since 1996. She has served as a Senior Assistant Director of Admissions (Washington U), Application Reader (University of Michigan), Assistant Director of College Counseling (private prep school in St. Louis), and an independent college counselor. She is happy to advise you as you apply to college.[hs_action id="3910"]